Impossible. Helen Thomas Is Indestructible, People.
"Washington, D.C. legend Helen Thomas has been off the job for the past three weeks suffering from a gastric infection that has caused her to miss her weekly column for Hearst Newspapers, according to Hearst D.C. Bureau Chief Chuck Lewis." [E&P]
Oooh! An octogenarian "gastric infection!" Just in time for the lunch hour! You can thank me later. (Um. Ew, gross, Helen Thomas' rattley insides, ew, ew, retch.)
Come on, you know Keith Richards and the roaches will go the way of the dinosaurs before Helen thomas. You just know ..