Much Ado About Not Much
(Clockwise, from top right, Harper's editors from 1941 through 2010.)
Cause? None in particular it seems, except for “the general weakness of the magazine’s newsstand sales and circulation figures.” Well, that would put Hodge in good company with the magazine’s previous editors. Hey, it’s hard to be a gangster.
*Yes, related.
CNN has ACTUALLY entitled the next hour of programming thusly: “Our special investigation: ‘Somali Pirates: Can They Be Stopped?’”
Good goddamn GRIEF. I formally declare the line between local news shops and major media outfits to be null, void, squished, etc.
What’s that? I’m seven or so years late to this revelation? Oh.
Christ amighty—do you ever eat? How’s the pay for professional commentating anyways? (She asked, ironically.)
…is what Associated Press CEO Tom Curley said tonight with his angry angry eyes to Arianna Huffington on Charlie Rose.
Arianna: “Citizen journalism…link monetization…mmmbblllrr…don’t block the box, I mean…mmmbbbllrrr…anyone who tries to…mmm….I could kick Tom Curley’s ass through this satellite connection, you know…let me tell you…what the Huffington Post is doing right now, Charlie, we’re—”
Charlie Rose: “And that’s all the time we’ve got.”
And yes, I am looking forward to my 65th birthday. Tom Curley and Arianna Huffington on the AP’s ludicrously ambitious plan to reign in use of their content. Robert Morgenthau on his retirement.
Right now, Arianna is explaining How The Internet Works to Tom.
No police officer had to take this man out, who had terrorized this center and this community. He killed himself. Can you imagine—what a coward. Locked them in, trapping them like mice in a cage, mowed them down. He’s dead now. Now Neil Cavuto.
In the absence of any additional news, Fox News anchor Shep Smith will fill your on-air gaps with somber prose, a skill he’s got pretty well wrapped up by now. Smith was Fox’s on-the-ground guy for Princess Di’s death, the Oklahoma City bombing, the execution of Timothy McVeigh, Columbine, TWA Flight 800 and Hurricane Katrina.
Get this man some uppers, stat.
“I don’t think it really much matters either. I know he’s dead and…there are worse things that could have happened today. Now, Fox News has confirmed that he is 41. The Associated Press now says 42. Again, it does not matter. He is neither age anymore.”
—Lyrically-inclined Fox News anchor Shepherd Smith speculating on how Binghamton shooter Jiverly Voong might have died.